I know I have posted it a few times now, but I am starting a new karaoke show at the River Market Brewing Company, and I really need some help building this show. I am almost starting from scratch, so I need anyone who is 21 or over to come out and support my new Friday night show...

You can sing, drink, or just sit there and enjoy the show, it doesn't matter as long as you make an appearence. Stay all night or just pop in for a drink...

River Market Brewing Company
5th and Grand
Kansas City, MO

8:30 - Midnight Thirty on Friday!!!

By Kurt B. Reighley
Special to MSN Music

One of the highlights of the seventh annual Americana Music Conference was a stellar performance by Charlie Louvin of the Louvin Brothers. With their close harmonies, Charlie and his older sibling, Ira, revolutionized country music in the late '50s and early '60s, racking up hits, including "When I Stop Dreaming" and "Must You Throw Dirt in My Face." The duo disbanded in 1963, and Ira died in an automobile accident two years later, but Charlie has continued to record and perform, off and on, ever since.

Well, the younger Louvin is definitely "on" right now, as he was at that live gig last fall. His new self-titled album of revamped Louvin hits (including "The Christian Life," later immortalized by the Byrds) and country classics features more notable guests than many red-carpet award shows. Are you ready? Here we go: George Jones, Tom T. Hall, Bobby Bare, Elvis Costello, Tift Merritt, Will Oldham, Jeff Tweedy, Marty Stuart, as well as members of Lambchop, Bright Eyes, Blanche and Clem Snide. Damn.

Ryman Auditorium, original home of the Grand Ole Opry, is another piece of country history that's still going strong. And last May 6, it welcomed a very different sort of act: Erasure. As part of their sold-out acoustic tour, Vince Clark and Andy Bell put down the synthesizers and substituted banjo, mandolin, pedal steel and double bass. That show is preserved on their new live disc, "On the Road to Nashville." Their third album in three years (with a fourth, "Light at the End of the World," due May 22), this 18-song concert disc includes new versions of smashes from the duo's 22-year career ("Chains of Love," "Oh l'Amour") interspersed with stripped-down incarnations of less-familiar catalog selections, à la their last studio offering, "Union Street."
Listen to "On the Road to Nashville

Where the heck have Indiana pop-punk outfit The Ataris been hiding since 2003's "So Long, Astoria," and its hit cover of Don Henley's "The Boys of Summer"? Well, they spent part of that time locked away in Los Angeles, making "Welcome the Night." They also spent several months wrangling with record business tomfoolery. But finally, their fifth full-length release is in stores. Their lineup has been expanded to seven members, including keyboard player Bob Hoag and cellist Angus Cooke, and the music is similarly ambitious, atmospheric and moody. The guys couldn't have picked a better producer to nurture their dark side: Australian vet Nick Launay's mind-blowing résumé includes clients such as Nick Cave, The Church, Gang of Four and Kate Bush.
Listen to "Welcome the Night"

Apropos of his new album, "Atlantis - Hymns for Disco," Canadian rapper k-os recently remarked, "When an artist expresses their truth honestly and with a pure heart, they can end up speaking for a myriad of people." From someone else, that might sound like total baloney -- or an old P.M. Dawn press release -- but this Trinidad-born, Toronto-based producer has already proven his diverse appeal, winning three 2005 Juno Awards, and collaborating with The Chemical Brothers on the Grammy-nominated dance track, "Get Yourself High." Having confounded critics in the past with lush orchestrations and having sung as well as rapped vocals, k-os continues to defy easy categorization on his third album, which includes contributions from rocker Sam Roberts, Kevin Drew (Broken Social Scene) and fellow Canadian hip-hop artist Buck 65.
Listen to "Atlantis - Hymns for Disco"

In these tense times, it seems odd to look forward to any sort of noisy pyrotechnics overhead -- unless you're speaking of celebratory fireworks, or Texas band Explosions in the Sky. After winning praise for their score for "Friday Night Lights," EITS is back with its first studio album in nearly four years. Recorded by John Congleton (The Roots, Mountain Goats, Polyphonic Spree) in the Minnesota backwoods, the disc features just six songs, but fans of experimental indie rock instrumentals à la Godspeed You Black Emperor! definitely get their money's worth: The epic "It's Natural to Be Afraid" alone clocks in at more than 13 minutes. Want more? Of course you do. A special limited-edition, double-CD version includes remixes by Jesu, Adem, Four Tet and more.
Listen to "All of a Sudden I Miss Everyone"

Just wanted to send out a special thank you to my friends that came out to party this week. I had a busy week, and a lot of fun. It was nice to have some friendly faces in the crowd and singers at my show!

Me love you long time,

Romeo

PS- If you didn't come out, I am not mad, just disappointed...

I have a lot going on this week. Fat Tuesday party tonight from 7-1am at Paddy O'Quigley's in Leawood, 119th and Roe... Free to get in, $10 to get on the bus for the pub crawl...

Adult Volleyball at the Parkville YMCA, Wednesday Night 7:30-9 PM. FREE to all just sign in at the front desk. Not competitive, just fun and good excersise...

FRIDAY!!! I have my first show at the RIVER MARKET BREWING COMPANY at 5th and Grand... I really need the support and starting karaoke shows is always hard, so bring anyone that can sing or drink out to the RMBC on Friday, 8:30 PM to 12:30 AM!

Saturday is back at Paddy O'Quigley's for the best karaoke show in Kansas City. This show is 9 PM - 1 AM...

$1,000 still up for grabs on both Friday and Sat. Both places are FREE to enter also!!!

Come hang out and have some fun this week!

Romeo

Greetings from Kelly Urich, the most trusted name in hit music!

For those of you who've called and emailed about my Starbeams in the Kansas City Star, they will most likely appear in the Sunday paper's Hearne Christopher column. Technically, I'm supposed to write different stuff for Starbeams than I do for this newsletter. I'm spending a lot more time writing when you include the stuff I write for radio, Starbeams, this newsletter and all the stuff I write on highway overpasses.

It has been a cold, miserable week...

It was so cold...People in the East bottoms are trying to ignite more chemicals.
It was so cold...3 muggers here in Westport phoned in sick.
It was so cold...women at bitter ball needed defrosters just to cry...
It was so cold...the mice here at Mix were playing hockey in the toilet.
It was so cold...Monster Truck Lloyd was drinking HOT DAMN!

The Kansas City street crew salt supply is dwindling because of the massive amount of snow this winter.
**They say if it gets any worse they're going to have to dip into Rocket's margarita cabinet.

Quote of the week: Madonna - I want to be like Gandhi and Martin Luther King and John Lennon, but I want to stay alive.
**I feel the same way about Anna Nicole.

Winner of the Best of Kansas City best Italian restaurant? Garozzo's. Award on the way. Thanks to the staggering number of people who voted! Next question. Best pizza in Kansas City? Vote at http://www.kellyurich.com/

The trend setting University of Kansas is spending $2.6 million to go wireless.
**They started a trend when they went braless in the 1970's.

Evolution is now being taught in Kansas Schools, a change after years of international ridicule. A survey shows nearly 20% of people in Kansas don't believe in dinosaurs.
**Even Fred Phelps believes in dinosaurs.
What are the odds you spot Fred Phelps wearing a Tim Hardaway jersey?

Another sign of a locally owned restaurant struggling with staying afloat. Stephenson's Old Apple Farm Restaurant closed Wednesday and messed up a lot of Valentine's Day reservations.
**That's why I always play it safe on Valentine's Day and go with a national chain like IHOP.

If you think American Idol is cool, but you would like to see a higher level of talent. Check me out as I host Harrah's Lucky Break #1 on TV on Saturday night. It will make you laugh... squirm and feel violated. KMBC 9 is the place.

Bad news for subscriber Tim Smith in Las Vegas... Vegas received top honors on the Men's Fitness fattest city list. Kansas City did not make the top ten this year. The healthiest city was Albuquerque.
**Kansas City has a real shot at taking healthiest city honors if Ryan Simms gets cut from the Chiefs.

Marty Schottenheimer was unexpectedly fired by the San Diego Chargers.
**Tanner's must have opened a bar in San Diego.

Check the radio show Mon-Fri on Mix 93.3 and online on www.mix93.com and remember, I personally inspect the quality of every song I play...

Ok Partiers...

I am giving you a full weeks notice about our NEW SHOW at the River Market Brewing Company on Fridays...

Amazing Beverages, Great Food, and now... Singing Company Karaoke WITH ROMEO on Friday Nights from 8:30 PM to MIDNIGHT THIRTY!!!

We are off this weekend, but the debut show is next FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 23, 2007. Show up early to get some food and liquid courage! PLUS, don't forget about the $1,000 GREAT KANSAS CITY SING-OFF!!!

QUALIFY FOR THE SEMI-FINALS THIS FRIDAY!!!

River Market Brewing Comany
5th and Grand,
Kansas City, MO 64106

http://www.partykansascity.com/calendar.html

They don't call it the Big Easy for nothing! Picture if you will, your guests celebrating in the streets of the French Quarter, Bourbon Street, colorful masks and elegant costumes, aromatic spicy Cajun cuisine wafting through the air, the dizzying beat of New Orleans jazz, strands of sparkling beaded necklaces and coins everywhere.

Mardi Gras Invitations
Imagine their delight when your guests receive elegant feather-trimmed black mask invitations to the gala event of the year - Mardi Gras Masquerade Ball! Or choose festive Mardi Gras confetti invitation. Better yet, use a personalized Mardi Gras invitation for your event! Make sure to let guests know to come dressed in their most elegant costumes and get-ups with masks. If you're going to have a costume parade and judging (this always brings out creativity and competitive natures), include it on the invitation as well.

Decorations
As your guests enter the French Quarter through magnificent balloon archways and columns, greet them with the sounds of a Dixieland jazz band playing in the background. If you can't afford a DJ or live band, we have a great N'awleans sound CD you can order.

Purple, green, and gold are the traditional colors of the celebration, and can be displayed throughout the party room. Mardi Gras mask cutouts, giant metal and flamboyantly colored masks and colorful jazz player murals, Bourbon street signs, balloons in all shapes and sizes, and twinkling mask lights add a festive glow to your decor when hung on the walls and suspended from the ceiling. Hang feather boas and Mardi Gras beads and coins around mirrors. There's a huge selection of hats and masks to choose from. Make sure you have plenty of beads, hats and masks on hand for your guests to wear. Mix and match decorations or order Mardi Gras decorating kits.

Tables
Create a real feel for the French Quarter by decorating each activity center or food area in unique ways with custom-created themed signs, murals and archways. For example, fortune-telling area can be "Voodoo You Love" decorated in the deep, rich colors of the Mardi Gras mambo decor package; the beverage area, "Bourbon Street," of course; the "Cajun Kingdom" buffet area can be decorated with large Mardi Gras Ribbon Columns; a masquerade ball makes the perfect setting for a photo op area - how about "Big Cheeezy" and lots of masks and balloons? The French Quarter wouldn't be as easy and sleazy and fun without a Tattoo Parlor; there are people who provide Henna tattoos. You can even jazz up the music area or dance floor with musical archways and jazz player stand-ups.

With a large crowd, you'll want to have assigned seating. Colorful whistles on chains, maracas and mini tambourines all make fun seating cards and your guests will enjoy adding to the celebratory sights and sounds of the evening! Another sure bet for a sweet evening is Mardi Gras custom created with your company logo wrapped candy bars. DeeeeLish!

Metallic garland in purple, green and gold make beautiful table trimmings when set on any of the three color linens! Topped with gold paper products or guilded china, the rooms will sparkle! Beaded wrist bracelets double as napkin rings. Top all the tables with lots of colorful beads, coin necklaces and Mardi Gras confetti. Boy will this be fun!

Centerpieces
There are any number of great centerpiece ideas. One of my favorites is creating a large bouquet of feathered and sequined masks. (Make sure there's enough at each table for everyone to have one.) Wrap cylinders in multicolored beads. Add the stick masks and fill containers with Mardi Gras noisemakers, whistles, mini tambourines, glow necklaces and other fun stuff. Then top off the centerpieces will balloon clusters in purple, gold and green plus one large mask balloon in the center for height. Add a few Mardi Gras candles at the base and… Wow! You can also buy some great ready-made Mardi Gras balloon centerpieces.

Menu
Can't you just smell the zesty spices of the traditional New Orleans cuisine? Go Cajun! From Crawfish Etoufee to Seafood Gumbo or Jumbo Shrimp and Cajun fries, your guests will be begging for more. M-m-m-m-m, Great! You can also check out http://web.foodnetwork.com/food/web/searchResults?searchType=Recipe&searchString=mardi+gras&site=food and see what Emeril, the king of New Orleans himself, has to say about Cajun and Creole cuisine. And last but not least a King Cake for dessert! And finally, it's not a Mardi Gras party without Pat O'Brien's Hurricane Mix.

Activities
There are so many exciting activities you can plan, so pick and choose depending on your budget. Here are a few fun things your guests can do to while away the evening:

Have a costume parade and contest! Whoever has the most elaborate and creative costume is the winner!

All dressed up and ta-daaa! Capture it on film. Your guests will love a chance to strike a pose. If there's room in the budget, having disposable cameras on the table will give guests a chance to get to know their table mates and have fun taking pictures.

Another fun game that you can play is "Hidden Treasure." Divide everyone into two teams, and have a treasure hunt for gold Doubloons. You can hide a bunch of stuff with or without giving the teams clues as to the whereabouts of the "treasure." The team that finds the most "treasure" wins a prize!

Fortune Tellers, Tattoo artists, strolling magicians and/or musicians. It's all up to you. Just about anything goes on Bourbon Street!

Party Favors/Prizes
Mardi Gras Custom Created Candy Bar Wrapper
Mardi Gras Tambourines
Mini Neon Tambourines
Mardi Gras Lights
A bag of chocolate Doubloons are always a nice treat for your guests to take home. Also, different colored beaded necklaces or masks are a fun way to remember your time in your very own French Quarter.
But if you want to go all out why not serve up a traditional New Orleans drink, the Pat O'Briens hurricane in an authentic Pat O's glass that they can take home as a memento of your unforgettable event.

100 Worst Candy Heart Messages...

1. HARD UP
2. TOO TINY
3. NYET = NYET
4. SHOO
5. U SMELL
6. ART DORK
7. DIE ALONE
8. NO PUBES
9. KISS OFF
10. AMSCRAY
11. ICKY BOD
12. CALL 911
13. KILL PREZ
14. IT'S OVER
15. 1000x NO
16. SHOVE IT
17. RUG BURNS
18. DUMB ASS
19. R-U NUTS
20. BITE MOI
21. CAMEL TOES
22. YOU OAF
23. NO BALLS
24. ELECT ME
25. BIG BORE
26. HELL BOY
27. BROKE HIP
28. URA ZERO
29. BUTT OUT
30. LIKE HELL
31. TESH TOY
32. GOT FLAN
33. I'LL MACE
34. GET REAL
35. I H8 LOOP
36. EAT LEAD
37. F U
38. PISS OFF
39. OVER DOSE
40. SHAVE BACK
41. SUU EEEE
42. DS9 BUFF
43. R U DONE
44. FAL ICK
45. JAIL BAIT
46. NO BLOOD!
47. NERTS!
48. A+ LAMO
49. NO HOPE
50. I I I I
51. GO AWAY
52. FIX TEETH
53. DON'T TUCH
54. TOO SHORT
55. U-R SICK
56. WANT FRIES?
57. I'M GAY
58. FEAR ME
59. GET OUT
60. PEACH FUZZ
61. KEWL
62. STEP OFF
63. YODA MAN
64. NO BUTT
65. I'LL HURL
66. GOT CRABS
67. NOT NOW
68. NOT EVER
69. DISCO
70. IT'S OFF
71. NO NECK
72. GET A PIMP
73. WRONG
74. U-R DEAD
75. SCAT
76. IN-BRED
77. CUT ONE
78. GET REAL
79. DRY UP
80. EAT LEAD
81. PISS OFF
82. WAKE UP
83. HO HUM
84. TOO FAT
85. PIZZA FACE
86. TRY SOAP
87. NICE LISP
88. WASH OUT
89. I'LL DUMP U
90. GET OFF ME
91. BAD HAIR
92. FISH
93. I'LL YELL
94. TWAT ROT
95. FOR SALE
96. ZIP FLY
97. I QUIT
98. KILL ME
99. GO NOW
100. AS IF

The Grammys are never the best indication of what was important in a year in music, or even necessarily what was truly popular, but they can be useful in gauging some of the trends, styles, and sounds for a given year. This roundup of nominated songs for the 2007 Grammys -- sure to be followed by a collection of winners -- is better than most of its kind, and better than most of the Grammy albums, too, in capturing the feel of the year. Perhaps it's chronicling a year where things were getting so fractured that only the mainstream provided a consensus.

I'm horribly upset that the Anna Nicole hype has overshadowed the psychotic astronaut chick hype, but the show must go on. What a strange week. We had a huge chemical explosion near downtown that left a dark cloud over the entire city. Within 10 minutes listeners had emailed me graphic photos of the explosion. I'm hoping our next big story happens at an area Hooters.

20 minutes into the story we were able to piece together exactly what had happened through listener calls. An alien craft had fired at Sprint Arena and missed by a couple of miles because Dick Cheney was on the trigger. Way to come through in a pinch, Mix listeners!

Props to the KC Fire Department. I never realized how underpaid and under funded they were until I saw them battling that chemical fire wearing nose clips.

If I don't get a chance to tell you, happy Valentine's Day! Remember: If your date is really ugly, instead of celebrating Valentine's Day, throw a Valloween party.

Hotwire.com has ranked Kansas City #5 in the nation for best value vacation destination.
Atlanta was #1, followed by Dallas, Raleigh-Durham, Orlando, KC, and Denver.
**Just wait 'til we get Legoland...TOGETHER WE WILL RULE THE GALAXY!

HOT ASTRONAUT!

That Lisa Nowak astronaut story is wack. She gets mad at a competing lover…drives from Houston to Orlando wearing a diaper so she wouldn't have to stop.
**Remember, space travelers are only cool wearing diapers when they live in the Degobah system.
(Two obscure Star Wars references in a row!)

One time while on a road trip, I tried peeing in a cup, but everyone on the Greyhound was staring at me and I couldn't go.

The Royals team slogan for 2007 is TRUE. BLUE. TRADITION.
**It's TRUE. We've been BLUE. Because the team has a TRADITION of falling into last place.

The great thing about being a Royals fan is we don't waste our money on a bunch of white towels in October.

The Dead Sea Scrolls have arrived at Union Station. I took the media tour and I was surprised to learn they were written on paper towels.

Subscriber of the Week: Woody Powers of The Peak 92.9 in Colorado Springs. Woody says he hates people who talk on cell phones when they drive, people who beat him at poker, and people who talk on their cell phone while beating him at poker. Thanks for joining the club and congratulations on the monster ratings.

Look for more Starbeams in Hearne Christopher's column Sunday in the Kansas City Star.

You still have a chance to watch some of the Chiefs in action. The Pro Bowl is Saturday at 5 on CBS. I want that job. I'm on a losing team, but I still get a free trip to Hawaii. Wait a minute...I've done my show from Honolulu....never mind.

The Kansas City Remodeling show is this weekend at the American Royal Center.
**The American Royal was the perfect venue because, we all know, most of us in the Midwest have dirt floors.

One of the candidates for KC mayor, Stan Glazer, wants to build a 50 story Ferris wheel on the riverfront downtown. It would cost 1/3rd what we paid for the Sprint Arena.
**But would attract the same number of professional sports teams.

This year's Ozzfest tour will be completely free of charge in the wake of escalating summer ticket prices. The cost of the shows will be underwritten by additional sponsors.
**I'm running out of excuses to NOT go to Ozzfest

A former NBA player came out of the closet. Utah Jazz center John Amaechi says he is ready to talk about gay life as a former NBA player.

Top 5 ways to spot a gay NBA star:
#5. Loves to play man to man.
#4. His Dream Team is Siegfried and Roy.
#3. Great at passing but loves receiving.
#2. During national anthem hums "It's Raining Men".
#1. Voted best ball handler….at MISSY B's.

Beyonce got three nominations from the Soul Train Music Awards March 10, to lead everyone in nominations.
**In a twist of irony, K-Fed will be valet parking cars at the event.

Bad press always follows the Super Bowl half time show. Some people claim Prince's guitar looked like a phallic symbol.
**Nobody claims that about Liberty Memorial and I had to pose for that thing for hours.

Barack Obama announced he is giving up cigarettes now that he is running for President. I didn't know he smokes, but now smoking is a no-no if you want to be leader of the free world.
**Barack did say while he hates his vice, smoking is still safer than meth.

Valentine's dinner is one of the biggest nights at Hereford House. That's why I'm taking Hillary there Saturday night. Be sure to check our special link for instant savings and to book your reservation online.

We are proud to have Hereford House as our official sponsor! www.herefordhouse.com/kusn

Check the radio show Mon-Fri on Mix 93.3 and online on www.mix93.com and remember, I personally inspect the quality of every song I play...

Kelly Urich/Mix 93.3
508 Westport Rd. Suite 202
Kansas City, MO 64111
www.kellyurich.com

Cold weather grips the East. You can tell it's frigid in Washington, DC. To keep warm, Joe Biden now sticks both feet in his mouth. (Alan Ray)

It so cold here in New York City, the Statue of Liberty is holding her torch under her dress. (David Letterman)

It was so cold here in New York, Donald Trump cuddled with Rosie for warmth. . (Conan O'Brien)

If you thought those "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" dudes were morons...you should have seen Dick Cheney trying to dicker in the Judge's chambers about his upcoming testimony at the Scooter Libby trial. He said he'd only answer questions about his hair. (Gorsefeathers, RadioOnline.com)

TimeWarner has agreed to pay $2 million to the city of Boston for the Cartoon Network advertising campaign that caused a widespread bomb scare. Most of the money will be spent on giving the guys who pulled the stunt a bath and a haircut. (Jake Novak)

More and more candidates are running for president in 08 and the campaigns are lasting longer than in any other presidential race. More than a “Presidential Race” it looks like a “Presidential Marathon.” (Pedro Bartes)

The Globe tabloid reports that Laura Bush wants a trial separation from her husband. There's no way the President can keep her in the marriage if she doesn't want to stay. He doesn't have enough troops left to surround the White House. (comedian Argus Hamilton)

Reportedly, the Bush's marital problems revolve around the same question as most marital problems -- over who's really The Decider? (HaBlog)

Of course, The Globe is not the best source for White House gossip. So we'll check this week's National Enquirer to be sure. (HaBlog)

Congratulations to Vice President Al Gore. He has been nominated for a Nobel Peace prize. Luckily for Gore, Florida doesn’t vote on this one. (Jay Leno)

There's a rumor floating around that the producers of "American Idol" may replace Paula Abdul with another judge. They also plan to replace Ryan Seacrest -- just as soon as they figure out what Ryan Seacrest does. (Toms Lake Humor Company)

The Eagles are coming out with their first album since 1979’s "The Long Run." You can tell the Eagles are getting older. This album is called "The Long Run to The Bathroom." (comedy writer Alex Kaseberg)

By Kurt B. Reighley
Special to MSN Music

The word of the week is "mature." As in, youngsters growing up, established stars stretching their boundaries ... and one surprise entrant wooing listeners into adult situations.

No new releases this week from the "American Idol" stable, but the nation's other talent factory, Disney Channel, takes up the slack as Ashley Tisdale of "High School Musical" graduates to the big leagues with her debut full-length, "Headstrong" (hear album). The first single, "Be Good to Me" and fan favorite "So Much for You" are gleaming specimens of up-to-date tween-pop, a la Hilary Duff's recent "Play With Fire," while the title tune suggests that 21-year-old Tisdale and her writer/producers (who include hit-makers the Matrix and Scott Storch) were not deaf to the appeal of Gwen Stefani's "Hollaback Girl."

Jiminy Willikers! A new Fall Out Boy just landed in town -- and there's something different about it. "Infinity on High" (hear album), the fourth full-length from the breakout emo-rockers, includes cameos from members of Panic! at the Disco and New Found Glory, and pop-punk riffs aplenty. On the first single, "This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race," funky urban beats alternate with explosive rock. And that's not the only surprise. The 14 selections include productions courtesy of Jay-Z and Babyface; some arrangements incorporate strings, piano and -- attention band buddies -- even euphonium.

U.K. postpunk outfit Bloc Party has grown up, too. Singer Kele Okereke pussyfooted around the topic of his sexuality during the media maelstrom over the group's 2005 debut, "Silent Alarm." Now, he addresses the love that dare not speak its name on two different songs ("Kreuzberg," "I Still Remember"). But sex is only one aspect of "A Weekend in the City"; paranoia and public transport, loneliness and late nights all pop up in its metropolitan musings, too. Without jettisoning the percussive pulse that has made them modern-rock faves, the group diversifies its timbres and tempos under the direction of producer Jacknife Lee (U2, Snow Patrol), with impressive results.

The kids are alright, but the old-timers are even better this week. Idiosyncratic iconoclast Yoko Ono reiterates her powerful influence over modern music with "Yes, I'm a Witch" (love that title). ONO-philes, including Le Tigre, the Flaming Lips, Cat Power and Public Enemy affiliate Hank Shocklee, were given access to her back catalog and permission to do whatever they wished with -- or to -- their favorite songs, retaining as much or as little of the original as they liked. The results are "Walking on Thin Ice," "Kiss Kiss Kiss," "Death of Samantha" and 14 others as you've never heard them before.

Rickie Lee Jones is back this week, too, delivering "Sermon on Exposition Boulevard," a set of songs inspired by the words and teachings of Jesus Christ. If you prefer your hipster patois and jazz/blues/country mix rendered with more of a full-bodied vocal delivery, check out "Children Running Through," the strongest effort yet from multiple-Grammy Award nominee Patty Griffin. This is a versatile singer in her prime, one who can comfortably share a spotlight with no less a veteran than Emmylou Harris ("Trapeze").

Lastly, tuck into "A Date With John Waters." As a special Valentine, the notorious moviemaker compiled 14 of his favorite, um ... well, they ain't love songs, but they'll get your blood pumping. Tina Turner tears up "All I Can Do Is Cry"; Josie Cotton dares to ask "Johnny, Are You Queer?" and Mildred Bailey rallies the troops with "I'd Love to Take Orders From You." Listen to this with that special someone nearby, and you may find yourself re-enacting a scene or two from Waters' sin-sational "A Dirty Shame." (Hey, better that than the climax of "Pink Flamingos").

By Judy Dutton

Yes, it’s that time of year again—when romantics everywhere send a flurry of rose bouquets, reserve cozy tables at fancy restaurants, and celebrate that mysterious thing called love. Only, we had to wonder: What would really get people’s hearts beating faster on this amorous holiday? To find out, Match.com asked more than 500 men and women to share some honest answers. Their responses will surprise you—and provide some interesting insight on what you should do on the big night.

Valentine’s Day: Do you love it or dread it?
68% love it
32% dread it

Would you rather go out with a boring date or stay home alone and watch a fascinating DVD?
79% would stay home and watch a fascinating DVD
21% would go out with a boring date

For Valentine’s Day, would you prefer your date treated you to a romantic meal or a $100 gift certificate to your favorite store?
81% prefer the meal
19% prefer the gift certificate

Would you rather your date were really good-looking or a great conversationalist?
68% prefer great conversation
32% prefer a good-looking date

Red roses on Valentine’s Day: cliché or still sweet?
78% think they’re still sweet
22% think they’re cliché

Is it a good – or bad – idea for a guy to buy lingerie for a woman he’s seeing?
65% think it’s a good idea
35% think it’s a bad idea

Have you ever scheduled more than one date for Valentine’s Day?
94% say no
6% admit yes

Would you rather receive so-so flowers at work (where everyone can see them) or receive a magnificent bouquet at home?
67% prefer receiving a magnificent bouquet at home
33% prefer receiving so-so flowers at work

What would be better on Valentine’s Day: A one-hour massage from someone you’re dating or a gift certificate to a professional masseuse?
87% would prefer a massage from their date
13% would prefer a massage from a professional

If you’re dating someone, do you always expect some action on Valentine’s Day?
61% say not necessarily
39% say absolutely

Men, which female celebrity would be your dream Valentine’s Day date?
31% Jennifer Aniston
24% Halle Berry
19% Cameron Diaz
17% Natalie Portman
10% Scarlett Johansson

Women, which male celebrity would be your dream date?
28% George Clooney
26% Matthew McConaughey
20% Johnny Depp
15% Leonardo DiCaprio
11% Denzel Washington

Which is the most romantic celebrity couple?
32% Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith
18% Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
15% Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas
14% Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick
11% Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes
10% Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner

Ever broken up with someone on or a few days before Valentine’s Day?
80% say no
20% say yes

Have you ever said “I love you” for the first time to someone on Valentine’s Day?
81% say no
19% say yes